Stop that 29-year old from drinking!

I got used to many things in Congo that are different in the states. With so many big changes, like no running water, driving a trunk, living in a rural town with dirt roads, I often forget about the little random changes I now come across on a daily basis in the United States.

Here are a few of the random products or insights I have noticed in America:

1- Red wine does not have a hint of vinegar
2- I have never eaten a Lunchable in my life, but I had completed forgotten about the pre-made assemble-it-yourself weird lunch phenomenon.
3- Spray butter. Why?
4- Offices do not keep supplies like pens under lock and key
5- I get carded for alcohol

On this point, yesterday my friends and I went to see Pan’s Labyrinth. When the 4:45 show was sold out, we decided to buy tickets for the next one and get a beer in the meantime. I did not have my ID on me, since I figured were only going to see the movie. We went to a brewery. The waitress gave us beer samples without carding, so I figured that I was in the clear. Wrong. I am 29, and even though I do not quite look my age, I certainly do not look 20. Not wanting to put the waitress in a bad position, I tell her that it’s okay if she does not want to serve me. She suggests my friend order my beer. Problem solved!

Or so I thought.

The waitress tells me five minutes later, apologetically and with a smile, that she will have to confiscate my beer if she happens to catch me drinking it. What? Que? Quoi? Having my friend order for me was her idea, not ours. My friends and I, albeit a bit baffled, create a system where they scan for the waitress each time I move in for a sip. One puts his hand to his chin when the coast was not clear. In this manner, I make it through two beers. People might think that Congo is absurd, but when I am using a friend’s hand signals in order to consume a beer when I am eight years past the drinking age, I would argue that the USA is not a bastion of logic.