Not many people make a decision to lead an uneventful life. As a goal, it is not a very good one. A person eventually settles into such an existence. But when I decided to leave the Democratic Republic of Congo, my home of 16 months, I did so with this very objective in mind. I wanted Sunday brunches, Target, and coffee with soy milk on a Friday afternoon while reading an Oprah-endorsed book. I wanted to just take an Advil when I got a headache, rather than have a panic attack that I had contracted malaria. Again.
People often tell me that they are envious of my adventurous lifestyle. They claim to live vicariously through me. I can see their point. When I read my former blog, Breaking Hearts in the Heart of Darkness, I see someone whose engagement with the world and unique lifestyle makes for an extraordinary experience, even if I never saw it as such at the time. That was simply my life, no exaggerations, and I included the annoyances and boredom as much as I did the beauty and excitement. The former usually outweighed the latter. For those that envied or even complimented my choice, I could not help but wish I felt the same love for my lifestyle. Ideas are easy to love, and the idea of living in such a stimulating place like Congo is like having a crush on an exciting hottie who drives a motorcycle and reads Camus. That was Africa for me. The land I liked from afar for one reason and grew to love for the frustratingly beautiful reality it is. However, I have chosen to leave that life for the tame one. I doubt this blog will inspire the same envy, but writing has become a lovely addiction.
This blog is about coming home - being a former expat, exploring urban jungles, and coming to terms with knowing that the rest of the world is there waiting for me like an old flame, as it is for every person who has or will step outside their own corner of the world. Welcome to the adventures and non-adventures of Conrad's ex-girlfriend, on the rebound from her relationship with the Heart of Darkness.
1 comment:
Welcome back to that world. As someone living in Kenya and who has been here for the better part of 6 years and more-often-than-not longs for that world where a headache doesn't cause a panic attack and skin color doesn't draw a crowd . . . I will live vicariously through you there. Will you eat a piece of fudge for me? And buy something stupid at Target just because you can? And let a fever (God forbid you get one - but if you do) - let it go for more than 4 hours before you take ANYTHING at all?
Live it up. Heather Jamison
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